do you ever learn a new fact and it fucks you over really badly even though it has no effect on your life but it still feels like your whole life was a lie anyways hey did you know barcode scanners scan the white spaces in between and not actually the black bars
Hugs are actually so underrated especially those hugs that are so tight u can literally feel the other person’s heartbeat n for a moment everything feels so calm and safe like nothing can hurt you
what she means: in Friends, Chandler was always considered very average and not that attractive, in fact the very base of his character was that he was the funny/goofy one, Ross was the smart one, and that Joey was the cute one, but Chandler was actually remarkably intelligent and hardworking, as well as the fact Matthew Perry was a very attractive man, whereas Ross most often got himself into awkward shenanigans and Joey was often very goofy. Chandler was the best of all three of them put together, without some of the other two's worse attributes (Ross' tendency to ramble on, Joey's grudge-holding, Ross' quick temper, etc), yet somehow it was considered by pretty much everybody in the Friends universe that Monica was a catch for Chandler and he should feel honoured to be dating her... Chandler was a brilliant character and it is unacceptable that his most prominent attribute, his comedy, has become recognisably his only positive attribute.
a harry potter au where potions is taught by gordon ramsay
neville: *messes up his potion*
gordon ramsay: *holds neville between two slices of bread* what are you
neville: an idiot sandwich
no no no!
Imagine that this is Gordon Ramsay a la Masterchef Junior
Neville: *messes up the potion, realizes it, starts crying quietly*
GR: What’s going on?
Neville: *explains how he messed up*
GR: Oh gosh okay…we can fix this, don’t cry, see, it’s fine now? Just be more careful when you’re adding the Newt’s eyes, all right? Drop them in gently. There we go. No more tears.
Neville: *giggles wetly, wiping eyes*
Yes, he only screams when he’s dealing with people that claim to know what they’re doing and clearly dont, when he’s teaching he’s very kind and patient because they’re still learning.
He’d probably do the bread thing to Malfoy.
nononononono. I get that Malfoy is a bit of a twat, but he’s still a kid. It’d be the teachers fucking up that he’d have trouble with.
Ramsay: All you had to do was treat it with a fucking Beozar!
Slughorn: It was a stressfu-
Ramsay: How long have you been teaching potions?!
or
Ramsay: So you’re going to raise this boy SPECIFICALLY so he can die as part of your twisted little scheme?
Dumbledore: It’s for the greater good, professor.
Ramsay: The greater fucking good?! *holds two slices of bread either side of dumbledoor’s face* What are you?
My favorite Gordon Ramsey moment is from the latest season of Master Chef Jr.
Gordon had run in to help a group of struggling kids with a team challenge and one of the older kids, a 12 year old boy, wasn’t passing attention while taking a pan out of the oven and not only spilled all the food but scalded Gordon.
It’s clear Gordon’s leg is in pain. He’s been badly burned without warning. But he doesn’t scream. He doesn’t yell, not even in pain, and he doesn’t go off on the child who is now frozen in fear. He calmly tells the child to set the pan down and to close the oven, safety first. Then tells him to go restart the food he was making, calm instructions.
My husband and I grew up in abusive homes where any mistake meant parents getting angry (my husband is terrified of spills or broken glasses because that meant beatings growing up, for me, anything going wrong, that could upset my mother, even if it wasn’t my fault meant screaming and emotional abuse).
I didn’t know someone could be so calm. That someone could not get angry, and put aside what they’re feeling (in this case a lot of physical pain) and not take it out on those around them, even when someone around them had messed up, because that person is a child.
Gordon Ramsey is a survivor of child abuse himself and as an adult, the most non-abusive person ever when it comes to kids.
i found more information about her! her name is frances goldin, and she’s a longtime new york activist and literary agent focusing on progressive works. she’s 92 years old and she’s been carrying this sign for not just five years, but at least 22 years! i found a few sources from the ’90s mentioning her and the sign, and this photo dated 1994:
“I adore my lesbian daughters, keep them safe,” said a sign held by 73-year-old Frances Goldin, who said society allows discrimination against gays and lesbians. She said her two daughters were marching in the parades in Portland, Ore., and San Francisco. Goldin said people had approached her with their phone numbers, asking: “Can I adopt you as my mother?”
She said she’ll call them. “Difference enriches us all,” she said.
naley appreciation week - day three: favorite happy scene ↳ Hi, you’ve reached the Scott’s, um, my wife and I are, uh- Your wife? What do you, like, own me now? Yeah, I do.
brb = be right back
bbl = be back later
gtg = got to go
igtmoabwiaijdbhihyu = i’ve got to move on and be who i am, i just don’t belong here, i hope you understand
Today I was rehearsing with the guitarist from the show I’m doing and I was coughing up a lung bc I’m sick and I was just kidding but I told him he needed to bring me a lemon for me to slice up and put in a cup of tea and so I show up to the show tonight to get ready and he sets down a big ass lemon on my dressing room table and then brings out like 5 boxes of Halloween Oreos and for those of you who pay attention to my posts you know what a big fucking deal that is and so long story short I now have a lemon and more Oreos than I know what to do with
update: tonight he brought me 2 lemons and a bag of cough drops. i’m running out of room in my fruit drawer in the fridge because i have so many damn lemons.
LIFE IS GIVING U LEMONS, MAKE SO LEMONADE !!!!!
okay but it wasn’t life it was a guy named howard
Update: tonight there were 3 lemons
Update: 4 lemons
Another update: I have 10 lemons and a date for Friday night
update: lemon boy carved pumpkins to ask me to be his lemon girl so lemon boy is now lemon boyfriend
update: lemon boyfriend and lemon girlfriend are very happy
update: lemon boyfriend and lemon girlfriend took a trip to the mountains this summer and decided that once they’ve graduated & are successfully pretending to be grown ups they will become lemon husband and lemon wife
Katelin.19.USA 
